I know its very normal to get advice from others who have gone through labour. Some days the things people have to say I find very valuable, others make me laugh and some days it sends me into panic and worries me. I have been really good lately about staying positive, but what shocks me are the people who seem to try and squash my positivity. I just dont get it. Heres a few of the comments Ive been thinking in my head when I hear those negative comments.
1.Them: "You are only 32 weeks pregnant? Oh wow you have so much longer to go still!"
Me: Really??? I have been pregnant for 32 weeks out of 40 already. I kind of feel like Ive come along way.
2.Them: "You are uncomfortable NOW? Oh just you wait."
Me: Yes actually, I am quite uncomfortable. I have constant pain up my back, left leg and hip. So much so that my Dr. has prescribed morphine for the pain (not that I have allowed myself to take it.) And yes, I do realize that the baby is going to get bigger yet. But do I really need to be told that several times a week?
3. Them:"You think you are tired now... just wait until the baby comes."
Me: Yes, I understand that I will not be sleeping much once he arrives. But thats been my reality for quite a while already. I havent slept for longer then a 3 hour period for well over a month and a half. Im already awake 5 or 6 times a night. Whenever I wake up I find myself thinking that I might aswell have a baby to take care of because Im up already.
4. Them: "You are going to get an epidural? Are you sure thats what you want?"
Me: Uhhhh yeah, is that so ridicules? I have been warned that this sciatic pain will get worse with each contraction. I don't think me being unconscience is going to help anyone during my labour.
And then there is the follow up to the epidural conversation...
5. Them:"Well what are you going to do if it doesnt work??"
Me: First of all... why on EARTH would you say that to a woman who is about to go through labour? And second of all, I prefer not to think about that. If it does happen theres not a whole lot I can do about it is there. Ill just have to deal.
6. Them: "Guess its a good thing you did all that travelling before you had a baby, that certainly wont be happening anymore."
Me: Uh, we arent dying? It is possible to travel with a child. I understand that its not nearly as easy to do and will require more planning and gear, but were ok with that.
Please dont get me wrong. I am incredibly excited and thankful to be pregnant and am not complaining about it at all. Its just exhausting to hear this stuff so often when you already feel like your body is falling apart. I have also been give some very good advice from others and have very supportive family and friends. Just dont try to squash a pregnant womans positivity please... were just trying to stay happy and get through our final few weeks.
Carolyn,
ReplyDeletei TOTALLY get what you are saying. I have thought very similiar things when people have said that stuff to me (especially the sleep thing, the uncomfortable thing and the travel comments). honestly, i had siatic pain too and i am getting more sleep now then i was when i was pregnant! the siatic pain is BRUTAL. i am SO sorry that you are having to suffer with that. i only slept 2-3 hours a night for months before jacob was born and once he was born i was getting 5+ hours a night! you will do GREAT! don't let those comments get you down. :)
Carrie - Wow, I felt like I could have written this! I heard those same things when I was pregnant.
ReplyDeletePeople said to sleep now because you won't be sleeping after the baby was born. Um. Babies sleep a LOT. They sleep like 18 hours a day to begin with. If you sleep when the baby sleeps, you are going to get tons of sleep in those first several months.
As far as comfort goes. The comfort level remained the same for me throughout pretty much the entire pregnancy - it was HORRIBLE from beginning to end. The end is no different if you ask me. Pregnancy is not an easy task, but it is well worth all the pain!
I'm with ya on the epidural! To this day, I still think back to how absolutely wonderful the epidural was for me. After months of nothing but pain pain pain... I had a few brief hours of being absolutely pain-free and I was able to focus on what I was doing rather than the pain. It was amazing :) Definitely worth it!!